Forgive Yourself Before Anyone Else Today

To Be BeautifulAs important as it is to let go of conflict with others by forgiving them, it’s just as important for you to let go of the negative self-talk and forgive yourself in the process.

Sometimes the reasons we argue stem from some deep seeded inner conflict that causes us to lash out. We hold onto resentment and anger out of fear.

Exercising forgiveness goes hand in hand with gratitude. Start with yourself.

Take a moment to consider how you would feel if you took a step back from whatever was causing you pain today and told yourself,

Hey, it’s okay. You did your best. It’s okay that this happened. This doesn’t mean that you aren’t loved. This doesn’t mean that you are alone. This doesn’t mean that things can’t change for the better. Let it go.

Go ahead and try it out this second if you can. Write it down and repeat it to yourself. Say it out loud. Or close your eyes and meditate.

It might feel kind of strange at first, but over time you’ll find this exercise to be vital and life-affirming. There’s no harm in trying.

As always, keep paying it forward. Stay healthy! 🙂

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Thankful Thursdays: No (Wo)Man is an Island

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Courage does not always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying,

“I will try again tomorrow.”

– Mary Anne Radmacher

 

 

It’s impossible to go through life without taking others into consideration. In the wise words of John Donne, ‘no man is an island.’ As much as I’d like to consider myself a trailblazer, walking down the road of life alone, without stopping to muse on what others might think about me, I’m human. I can’t help but wonder how the world perceives me.

Don’t compromise who you are and what you’re doing for the sake of others. That’s usually the advice I get when I start to get bogged down by negative thoughts. My confidence takes a nosedive and I find myself frozen, too scared to move forward or back because I worry about what my peers might think.

I’m a failure. My writing is terrible. I’m lazy. If I gain weight, I’ll be alone. Wasted potential. No substance….Loser.

Terrible line of thinking, isn’t it?

The reality is that when we preoccupy ourselves with what we think others are thinking about us, what we’re really doing is cutting ourselves down all on our own. We allow our fears to bully us into dark corners where we’re left powerless and immobilized. And the worst part is that it’s all our own doing.

I realize how depressing this sounds. Trust me, my goal is not to come here each week and be a downer for all of you. But it was important for me to reflect on some of the challenges I still experience  on my journey to wellness. It was a particularly dark week for me as I struggled past some of my deepest insecurities. 2014 hasn’t been very kind to me so far, and I’m often choosing between two difficult and unsavory options on an ongoing basis. And I imagine that many of you are in similar struggles.

We can be independent and driven as we strive to reach our goals, but it’s naive to think that we can block out the world in the process. Everything we do ripples out and affects those around us whether we realize it or not. Even when I’m feeling at my lowest and I’ve hidden myself away, I’m putting out an energy and that impacts my environment, for better or worse.

I’m grateful that when I have those days when all I’m doing is questioning all that I am, I can manage to look out and see love around me. Those moments offer an extraordinary opportunity to recalibrate. It’s a sucky process, no doubt about it. But a necessary one.

Take it one step at a time and forgive yourself for the little stumbles along the way. Don’t be scared to ask the hard questions and don’t be discouraged if you don’t have the answers right away. I know I forget that sometimes and that’s alright. We’ve all been there.

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What do you do to get yourself out of a funk?

What are you grateful for this week? Please feel free to share!

As always, keep paying it forward. Stay healthy! 🙂

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